Mabel the Maudlin Manatee

Mabel the Maudlin Manatee
loves a glass of wine or thirty-three.
Aside from the cost to her liver and budget,
this would be fine. But, there’s no way to fudge it:
Mabel gets moody after a few,
and on glass number twenty or twenty-two
starts to question the Meaning of All Existence –
a route Mabel’s husband meets with resistance.

Because after she’s wondered why she’s alive
(around glass twenty-four or twenty-five),
Mabel brings up all her past mistakes.
Chief of which, her foolish choice to forsake
a rich manatee whose name was Mike,
to wed Mr Mabel, who still rides a bike.

At glass twenty-seven or twenty-nine,
Mabel’s temper suffers a further decline.
She thinks back to her youth and tears start to flow
for the old days in the archipelago
when the sea wasn’t acid and covered in plastic.
When humans were fewer, conditions less drastic.

Finally, halfway through glass number thirty,
Mabel sobs, “Darlin’, d’ya still think I’m prrrurdy?”
And poor Mr Mabel spends what’s left of the night
reassuring his wife that she’s not an old fright.

So, if you dine with a sea cow named Mabel,
limit her drinking as much as you’re able.

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