Ethel the Ebullient Elephant
cried “I don’t see why the hell I can’t
go for a jog in a pair of high heels
and eat nothing but ice cream for all my meals.
I’m hiring the very best DJ in town
and inviting all of my ellie friends round.”

“But, Ethel, how will they fit through the door?
And, Ethel, might you not fall through the floor?”

“Oh hooey,” said Ethel, “Don’t be so pompous!
Don’t you know elephants need a good rumpus?”

And off she trotted in red Louboutins,
in search of mud-flavoured ice-cream with garlic croutons.